iO bartender Crago has dealt with a few drunks in his time, thank you very much, and New Year's Eve was no exception. "One of the patron had gotten a little too drunk. This always happens, right? I mean there’s always one in the crowd, right? YES! I’ve never seen this guy before, but let’s just say he was wearing a sweater vest with a t-shirt underneath it. Now I’m not one for fashion. In fact, the girls I work with at my dayjob have helped me take leaps and bounds with my wardrobe…but a sweater vest? I know better than that. Anyway, this guy was HUGE. A big, big dude…and he was hammered."

Andy Ross loses his sense of personal boundaries when it comes to Sudoku: "Maybe I could just look at your sudoku? I’ve been practicing not filling in the squares, and I’m pretty close to holding it all in my head. Please don’t get up. No don’t. SIT DOWN! There that’s better. Everything’s fine."

Have you seen Lauren Bishop's dignity? If you have, please let her know. She'd like to have it back. "Dignity has definitely run away from home before. The longest she has ever been gone is one month. That was about three years ago, while I was playing the Easter bunny at Marshall Fields, holding newborn babies for pictures. I am pretty sure she slipped away while I was quietly sobbing underneath a large wooden bunny head, my eyes too clouded with tears to notice her slip out."

iO's the Scene blogs about sexual politics in improv. Jon acknowledges that there are generally more males than females in the world of improv, and sometimes, a female improviser will be in class with a straight up creep. "While this problem is mostly the males making the ladies feel uncomfortable, the ladies also need to have thick skins. In a perfect situation, they wouldn’t need to deal with this. But the perfect situation won’t happen. You need to learn to deal with it when it happens. I’m not saying live with it or accept it; I’m saying deal with it. Don’t back down. Turn the tables on the guy. Or, heaven forbid, confront the guy who is making you feel uncomfortable."

The Scene's Molly goes on to say "In my opinion, you are in total control of your improv 100% of the time.... shit or get off the pot. Feminism is about owning your own shit. So own it! Don’t wait for a man to make you a doctor in a scene… make yourself one! If a guys tries to hump you onstage, hump back, or say no, or be an undercover cop, or whatever…but it’s your choice."

Mike Holmes recaps the Year in Stupid News: "Teens binge drink, government study finds.The study’s findings are contradictory to long-held beliefs that teens prefer to sip on expensive Scotch at exclusive social clubs."

It's probably a good thing that nobody gave Nick Vatterott a Kay's Jeweler gift certificate for Christmas: "What is it? Women love looking at jewelry, it’s appeasing to the eye. I like looking at baseball cards. That doesn’t mean that I’m going to hang them from my earlobes. Which probably for the best since I don’t have any good cards. I’d have to wear like a ‘79 Bob Euker, and an ‘88 Tops Checklist Card."

- Elizabeth McQuern