The Sun-Times is reporting that Gary Medina, an aide to Ald. Dick Mell (33rd), is concerned about a lotus flower sculpture that will adorn the front entrance of the new Kimball Brown Line Station.
"Call me simpleminded. I appreciate art," Medina said. "But when I see this, that's what I see [a penis]. I certainly don't see a flower." (The Bastion wonders if Mr. Medina has ever considered that penises look like lotus flowers, rather than the other way around.)
Ravenswood sculptor Josh Garber designed the ten foot tall aluminum sculpture, which met the approval of community leaders and local art experts and community leaders several months ago. Some think that a rendering of the sculpture makes it appear more phallic than it actually is, which may be contributing to the numerous concerned phone calls the alderman's office has been receiving.
The community representative Mell placed on the panel, John Friedman, said "It didn't look like a phallic symbol to any of the nine committee members (who approved the design). Anyone who sees a phallus here has a very sick mind."
It is Medina's hope that the sculptor will modify the design somewhat, specifically to "soften it up a little." Ahem.
While The Bastion is trying hard (ahem) to avoid the obvious jokes ("hey, does he see the world through dick-colored glasses?"), we invite you to contribute your own dick jokes in the comment section of this post. Let 'em fly.
(Link via Reddit)
-Elizabeth McQuern
A suburban Chicago woman delayed alerting authorities that her elderly father had died while the pair was traveling on an Amtrak train, so she could save the cost of shipping his body home to Chicago. 
Second City alum and i.O. master improvisor 
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